If you think I’m only angry at you, you’re wrong. But you are responsible for the actions people take because of your own words. That’s what being an activist is, and instead of telling your followers that what they were doing was wrong, you defended them, justified their actions because some white people actually do lie about their race for validation.

I also went back and read my posts, I never said “you assumed I was white”. You must be referring to when I said “ the people who look up to YOU decided that because you don’t think I understand racism, it must mean I’m white“ As in, because you decided that I didn’t understand racism, your followers decided that I must not have been really black. I did not say that you specifically said “you’re not black, you’re white”. I’m saying that you deeming me ignorant of the issues I and my own race face, and because of that, your followers thought to question my “ignorance” further by questioning whether or not I was black and demanding proof for literal months.

So my anger is not misdirected, because not only are your fans the ones who have been doing this to me, but you just defended their actions instead. I don’t care who a person is, you don’t defend the people who harass them for months on end to ask them for proof of their race, then tell the person that “no one forced you to try proving your blackness”. You could have easily “dragged” me as your followers would like to say, while at the same time acknowledging and putting down the behavior they’ve shown because of what you said to and about me.

It’s one thing having to prove I’m black to a few people here and there simply because they’re ignorant and closed minded, it’s another thing entirely when a very popular activist is the one feeding into that behavior without ever addressing how it’s wrong and instead defending the skepticism. I wouldn’t be nearly as angry with you if you had at least put your foot down and told your followers that yeah, while some people pretend to be black, it’s fucked up and wrong to demand proof just to validate someone’s opinion.

And I don’t care why you didn’t tell them, and I don’t care what your feelings of me are, I care that you went out of your way to absolve yourself of any responsibility for what your followers did because of your actions deeming me ignorant of racism. I care that you went out of your way to defend people’s actions. I care that you played the “well  no one forced you to try and get people to leave you alone by releasing personal info” act. I care that you think I should be grateful for your politeness when I came to you notifying you that your own followers have been harassing me for months demanding photographic proof that I’m black because they don’t believe my own words because you claimed I was ignorant of black struggles. I care that you think my anger is misdirected, that my anger towards you isn’t valid, simply because you did not explicitly tell people to harass me for months. 

I don’t take part in activism seriously anymore because of this website, and because of things like this and people like you. I live my life as best I can letting everyone else take the reigns of the movement, because according to people like you, I’m ignorant because my opinion differs from yours. Because of people like your followers who’ve been bugging me about my skin color for months, decided that because my opinion is different, I must be a white person lying to have my voice heard.

Activism involves the responsibility of all of your actions having reactions, good and bad, but what do I know? To you, I’m ignorant of everything because I thought an idiot white guy on the internet made a mistake based on the words of actual black people he knew. To too many of your followers and people like them, I’m ignorant because my difference in opinion must mean I’m a white person. You defended your own followers skepticism of my race, yet then claimed I didn’t have to direct them to my selfies. You said it shouldn’t matter what strangers think of me, yet you’re an activist who is always saying things to make strangers think something or at least think about something.

So no my anger is not misdirected, because while I’m angry at the people who have come to me questioning my race, your own actions (not just the ones that sparked your followers into asshole harassment mode) towards me have been contradicting and evasive. You even had the nerve to claim that your politeness is something I should thank you for, as if you being polite or nasty is the problem here. And for what? Image? Ego? The good feeling of educating those you think are wrong?

The only thing I’ve learned from these months of people bugging me and your responses is that activism is not at a point yet where people can have different opinions without having to prove their voice is valid, so why should I bother? Unfortunately for all of us, I got tired of your followers harassing me for months on end and said something to you. Turns out instead of acknowledging how your followers were taking your words incorrectly and that their demands of proof of my race were wrong, you defended them! Whatever it is you and your followers want(ed) out of me, I hope you have it and can just get the hell out of my life already. But if you honestly thought I was just going to sit here forever and take what your followers dish out and be satisfied with forced politeness and condescending responses from you? You were wrong, and you are wrong. I want you all out of my face, and I want you all to grow up a little and either stop being petty enough to demand people prove their race, or (in your case specifically) learn to take responsibility for how your activism moves others.

I hope we never have the displeasure of a conversation again, and that you at least have the decency to not defend your followers if this happens again to someone else, no matter how much you like the person’s attitude or not. Now, it’s December, so happy holidays, and goodbye.

chescaleigh:

I haven’t done anything to you. I also wouldn’t go so far as to call people my “fans” just because they disagree with the way you tone policed me in defense of blackface and blatant racism. I’m not responsible for anyone who shows up in your askbox. The same way I’m not responsible for people reblogging something I wrote on tumblr.

No one forced you to put “I’m black” in your description, the same way no one forced you to assert that an unnamed YouTuber’s blackface didn’t “mean to mock anyone.”  YOU chose to respond to my initial post to downplay the harm of perpetuating racist stereotypes for “comedy.”  YOU made me a bulleted list explaining away the effects of racism. Welcome to the internet, where if you share your opinion, SOMEONE is going to respond to it. 

Sadly, there are too many racists who pose as black people online in an attempt to give their disgusting racist views validity. If people have mistaken you for one of those people, that has NOTHING to do with me and everything to do with YOUR OWN WORDS. With that said, I would argue that if you’re secure in your blackness, there’d be no need for you to put “I’m black” in your bio and direct people to selfies. I mean. You know who you are, why do you care if internet strangers don’t believe you’re black? As for validity…I mean you’re entitled to your opinion, even if it’s wrong. But if you’re truly secure in your opinions…I’d say your race doesn’t make it more valid. I mean, Ben Carson is wrong about a TON of things and his blackness doesn’t change it.

Let this serve as a friendly reminder. If you contact me on a PUBLIC PLATFORM, do not be surprised if my reply to you is public. The same way my response to you now is public. If you need to contact me privately, do so through the contact form on my site. But don’t act brand new when I respond to you on Tumblr and then you’re surprised that others have something to say about the exchange.

Honestly, I was a lot nicer in this response than I previously promised I’d be, so you’re welcome. 

You honestly feel no responsibility or remorse for the damage you’ve done, do you? Don’t give me that “I’m being nice to you, you should thank me for that” bullcrap, you’re being polite to hold up an image and to rally your fans who will to continue to come to me and question my race for months on end because you, even now, won’t even make the effort to admit that what they’re doing is petty and wrong. There’s a difference between being cautious of white people lying about their race, and claiming every person who disagrees with you about something involving race is a white person who’s lying. They are not “mistaking” me as white and you fucking know it. Don’t play the dumb compassionate activist, you know exactly what’s going on and you know exactly how to play it to stay looking glossy and pristine. You’re actively defending that kind of childish bullshit and you expect me to be grateful? Fuck you.

No amount of activism or education you dish out can excuse your own mistakes, and you need to learn to take responsibility for how the people who are fans of you, who look up to you, handle everythign you do and say. Or are you such a bad activist you won’t even admit to the fact that your action can have negative consequences? Of course I know who I am, but it gets very annoying and stressful when you have dozens of people harassing you, claiming that you’re a racist, demanding proof that you’re really black. Maybe you’ve forgotten since you’re so far up there on your high horse, how that feels. Or maybe you’re just a prick that doesn’t care. Maybe a little bit of both. I don’t really care why, what matters is what you did and what you continue to do and refuse to take action on.

I don’t need to contact you privately, everything you do and say should be public when it’s about these matters. Unfortunately instead of being mature and admitting that your actions had negative consequences because the people who look up to YOU decided that because you don’t think I understand racism, it must mean I’m white and deserve some poking, prodding, and harassment months and months after the fact to see if I’m really black or not. I can admit when things I do have consequences, don’t try to turn this around and act as if I’m the one who’s doing this to myself. Your fans were rallied by your words, and now that you refuse to say anything remotely mentioning how what they’re doing is wrong (instead you’re defending them), you’re fanning the flames. To top it off, you’re trying to bullshit me into being grateful because instead of being nastier, you’re being politely condescending instead. Would you like me to bend down and grovel, to thank you for not sending me death threats and for instead continuing to belittle me? Should I be grateful that you’re not a blatant jackass and are instead a more subtle, collected and controlled jackass? Screw you and your fake “kindness”.

I hope your popularity treats you well while it lasts. Have a nice life, asshole.

You did not “trigger” me. You angered me, and annoyed me, just like every other person who’s come to me with the same accusations. Ever since that damn chescaleigh post I’ve gotten nothing but people like you doing what you did and then some. I don’t give a damn about Shane Dawson, but just because my opinion on whether what he did was racist or not differs from some super popular black person on the internet does not warrant you or anyone else coming to me, months and months and months after both the incident and post, to question whether I’m black or to belittle the fact that I’m “broadcasting” the fact that I’m black just to shoo off a few of the less determined flies.

I don’t write essays, I get my point across so that I never have to deal with this crap again. Since clearly, simply saying “I’m black” is not enough for you people. Maybe these “essays” are all that gets through to any of you.

There’s nothing puzzling about two people having a different opinion on something. No minority group works on a hive mind and it’s time people like chescaleigh and you start realizing that, rather than belittling or invalidating everyone else’s opinion because to you they “don’t know any better”. I didn’t “go in on” anybody, you make it sound like I was having a witch hunt when it was quite the other way around. I only responded to the witch hunt on Shane Dawson, not because I give a damn about him or whether or not he specifically is racist, but because I did not (and still don’t) believe that what he did was racist. It’s a difference of opinion on the topic of racism, something that shouldn’t be slapped onto anybody and anything when there is clearly enough difference in opinion in the community that matter (in this case, black people).

Apology not accepted, next time don’t send somebody an ask with attitude because they’re “broadcasting” something about themselves that your poor activist heart just can’t believe in. People like you have ruined my experience on tumblr, to this day, over something and someone that is so irrelevant and pointless. And for what? You claim you were just “puzzled”?

This is a genuine, friendly hint for you; If you’re going to message someone about something because of a very popular post you saw, if the post is months old, do not message that person. People have, and I guarantee, have already messaged that person for better or worse and they do not need more questions months after the fact. Or did the fact that I haven’t posted anything in a long time not click in your head that maybe I’m not a big fan of sticking around this filth hole of a website anymore? Think before you act, because believe it or not there are consequences to being an asshole to someone about something personal that has literally nothing to do with you.

Awww, this is absolutely precious. @ellekeli Let me tell you something since you took the time out of your day to be an asshole. About a year ago, I was very invested in the social justice “community” here on tumblr. Tumblr’s sj “community” is so full of shit that the second anyone disagrees with someone on an issue, they’re instantly labeled a cishet white male etc. etc. and their opinion is invalidated. I do not have to broadcast that I am black, no, but you know what “broadcasting” I’m black has done for me since I added it to my info bar? A lot less ignorant assuming dicks like yourself have tried to write me off as something I’m not.

I “broadcasted” that I was black because I was sick and tired of hypocritical closed minded douchebags  telling me that I was racist against my own race simply because I disagreed with them on either an incredibly stupid or incredibly extremist “social justice” opinion they had. But even THAT didn’t stop assholes like you. Telling me that if I was really black, I would “prove it” by posting pictures of myself. And I did, post pictures of myself. Even though I didn’t want to post pictures of myself because I was a minor that didn’t want a bunch of creeps staring at me, I did it anyway because I felt that I actually did have to prove my blackness to people like you.

Would you like to see pictures of me? Would that satisfy you? Or would you just, in embarrassment and shame, try claiming I used photoshop? Someone actually told me that once, it’s amazing how far you people will go to feel high and mighty. So very afraid and angry when you’re wrong or someone dares to disagree with you.

Go on, prove your hypocrisy. Ask me to link you to my selfie tag. Do it, and prove that I apparently DO need to “broadcast” that I’m black. You’ve already half proven that people need to prove their minority status to be believed. You “highly doubt” that I’m black off my word alone, so you clearly expect more proof out of me. And the only proof of what my skin looks like would be a photo. Do you want pictures of my parents, too? How about my sister? My aunts, uncles, and cousins perhaps as well just to be extra sure?

You’re a piece of shit and you’re what’s wrong with this website, its twisted “social justice”, and you only push back the movement for actual social justice for every condescending, mistrusting heap of bullshit that comes out of your mouth every time you think you know better than a complete stranger.